My heart is hurting.

All around me I see the pain people are going through and it seems we, as humans are having a hard time moving forward. Intellectually and probably somewhere deep inside my heart, I know this is just the chaos of change and transformation as we move into a new era of life here on earth. However my heart still hurts with the collective pain we are all experiencing. It doesn’t understand the choices and decisions that are being made. It feels as if we are not making any progress and in some areas even stepping backwards. The pain that we inflict on each other is causing a huge confusing jumble of pain that is hard NOT to feel.

We are all one and if we tap into the universal web, we can feel those around us and they can feel us. Anything that happens to one of us, happens to all of us. So given that, it is painful to watch as anger and rage rise up within us as we try to assuage the pain we feel.

Let me say a little about anger and rage. I have learned that anger is simply an energy just like joy. Most of us have had only destructive experiences with anger so we are often afraid of it. We try to hide it or only let it out in little bits or in what seems like appropriate situations. This is the worst thing we can do with anger energy. Anger energy is like a gas, if we try to contain it, the pressure will rise and soon anger will explode out through any available crack in very inappropriate ways.

When we can allow our anger to just be present and feel the power of the energy, it can be a very pleasurable experience and it can be used constructively. Anger energy is the energy that allows us to get what we really want when we’ve been missed in some way. When we haven’t been heard correctly, anger energy can help us raise our voices and find the words to express what we want to be heard. Martin Luther King, Jr. was a very angry man. However, he used that anger constructively to propel our nation forward into a new era of civil rights using the power of non-violence.

I have watched with a sad and hurting heart over the past month as huge issues have been raised in our culture and how we as humans are responding. These are big issues, issues of race and women’s rights and clean food production, issues that NEED to be resolved for us as humans to evolve. Yet, I watch and listen to the often very heated debates and feel sad that we can’t just have a dialogue where each side can actually hear and receive the other.

“Everything communicates and is connected, and when we feel the depths of this connection it changes the way we relate to all life. This is what the ancestors see and interact with through the life we live…”
Ancestral Teachings

Having compassion for and listening to another point of view is sometimes very difficult, I know. And it does not negate one’s own point of view and does not necessarily mean we are ‘giving in’. I know from experience that when I get into conflict or in opposing corners with someone, I want to stand my ground and not give in. When this part of me takes over, I have a very hard time even hearing what the other person is saying. Everything thing they say feels like an attack. There is no way I am giving an inch.

This is where I see our society right now. Everyone has drawn their lines and is standing their ground over what they believe is right and they are not able to hear the other side — AT ALL. Everything feels like an attack. Everything from the other side seems wrong or at odds with their own view.

What can we do about it? What can I as an individual do about it? Plenty.

First, take a big step back, get mindful and notice what is going on within you. Why are you so caught up in the issue at hand? Where is your anger energy coming from? Where are you feeling missed, unheard, unseen? How much of this is really you being triggered by and resonating with the bigger issue?

These questions can’t be answered by the mind. The body, heart and soul have these answers. You must listen, through all the chaos and sometimes screaming mind, to hear the whispers of your heart, your body and your soul.

Once you have the answers, your heart begins to soften. You begin to have compassion for yourself and all that pain within and your heart softens some more. Your wounds begin to heal because they’ve been acknowledges and loved. You have more space, more compassion, more ease, more calmness, so that you can begin to really hear the other sides of an issue. You can begin to see their pain too and begin to understand things a little more from their perspective. And maybe you can begin to accept them just the way they are, warts and all, just as you accept yourself, warts and all.

When that happens, the world becomes a better place to live. Your heart, my heart, all of our hearts, become happier and we can live more joy filled lives.

And if you would like to learn more about how to bring more joy into your life, reduce stress, create better relationships, and generally feel more expansive, let’s talk. Contact me to schedule a 30 minute personal strategy session and we can begin the process of finding what tools work best for YOU.